WEDDING SPEECH



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Wedding speeches have long been a traditional part of each and every wedding day. 
  Not only is there the Best man's speech, Groom's speech and Father of the Bride's speech, these days, often the Bride makes one too. 
Making a speech can often be a nerve-wracking experience with timing and content of the essence to hold the audience. 
Add a novel touch and solve the age-old problem of the jitters by delivering your wedding speech - in verse. 
With its rhymical quality, delivery and timing is assured and sure to to keep your guests riveted.
   
  Scroll down to see sample wedding speeches to hopefully, boost your confidence.

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Wedding Speech 1
Best Man's Speech with a Scottish accent

Iím a sleekit, cowriní, timírous beastie,
O, what a panicís in my breastie,
yes, here I stand before you,
with my Yorkshire twang,
trust my attempt at Scottish,
starts my speech off with a bang.
Itís a broad, bricht and moonlicht nicht,
and thatís all the Scottish for now,
Burns would be turning in his grave
if he could hear my accent to thou.
And on the subject of accents,
thereís a fair collection here,
 East Yorkshire, Wales and the South East,
igniting the atmosphere.
Today we all have gathered,
on this cold-tinged, winter-clad night,
on the very first eve of November,
much to Gail and Alanís delight.
For here at Dundas Castle,
where thereís much Scottish ancestry,
Ďtis a place thatís suitably apt and grand,
for these nuptials to join its history.
So draw in a little closer,
and forthwith, I shall commence,
now comes the love story of our new Mr and Mrs,
all told in a non-Scottish tense.
Youíd think Iíd known Alan longer
but in fact, I met Gail first,
our parents were friends when were quite young
and her friendship with me was coerced.
She must now, like me a little,
as since then, the years have slid by,
and I wouldnít have been here today,
this role, Iíd not occupy.
Gail met Alan at work,
there too, at the same place was I,
yes, at Becal we all got together,
not a threesome, as that would imply.
But as colleagues, and soon to be best friends,
along with my lovely wife, Sue,
together we all had such great times,
and the four of us often still do.
One of those times was in ninety-six,
with Becal, out in in Hong Kong,
we four spent the whole week in various bars
while the trips, the rest all went along.
Alan and I had won an award,
for our contribution to sales,
why should we feel guilty for surrounding ourselves
with interesting wines and ales?
Visiting each otherís home 
was another thing we liked to do,
Fridays weíd pop round for a quick drink,
by Sunday, weíd bid our adieu.
Now theyíve moved down to Cumbran,
no more living two miles apart, 
dropping in for a quick drink these days,
takes us a month to depart.
During these aforementioned sessions,
Gail and Sue have been known,
to paint our masculine toenails,
sorry, Alan - our cover, Iíve blown.
We would also parade our latest,
and most fashionable underwear,
very drunk, wide awake and full of ourselves,
cavorting without a care.
Another time - another toenail evening,
Faith and Jim arrived at the door,
Jim fancied himself with pink toenails, 
Faith refused and laid down the law.
Now Alanís known for being cautious,
in a nutshell, with money, heís tight,
however has he not persuaded us all
to hold this wedding at his home tonight?
He hates spending unneccessarily,
to a restaurant thatís dear, heíll not go,
when a cheap one would be the better option,
and cooking at home, much more so.
He has a very strange obsession:
an interest in the contents of skips,
he hates seeing items going to waste,
if theyíre of use, into it, his hand dips.
He once found a shade and a lampstand
on his way to the pub one day,
but Gail and the boys stopped him
from taking it, to Alanís dismay.
He wonít hire anyone to do things
if he can do them for himself,
his wallet keeps hold of its cobwebs 
heíll sort out each screw, plug and shelf.
Unusually, he can be normal,
as a great father to Matthew and Finn,
they play football and go everywhere together,
heís your regular son-loving man.
He used to play squash for the county,
with his balls heíd give them such a clout,
but had to give it up, some time ago,
because his poor old body gave out.
Now Iíve ranted on about Alan, 
poor Gail, youíll think Iíve left out,
not so, dear people, itís her turn to come next,
Alan will be relieved, without doubt.
Gail can be a firey girl,
short-tempered can she sometimes be,
and also, at times, unforgiving,
if you were ever to disagree with she.
Sheís not prone to negotiating,
Alan says that in jest and not me,
heíll smooth out things as the diplomat,
theyíre beautifully complementary.
In a nice way, Gailís a bull,
in the proverbial china shop,
Gail says Alanís a lover not fighter,
and at this point, that subject should stop.
Yes, itís back again to Alan,
I havenít quite finished with him,
itís rather like his games of squash,
I intend to go out on a limb.
He wanted to join the army,
with his good friend whoís here, hello Steve,
but he missed his mother so much,
he returned before being given leave.
I havenít mentioned his cooking,
he loves it so passionately,
cooks great chillis and fantastic curries,
eats their leftovers for breakfast, does he.
Heís not into formality at home,
in shorts, while cooking, heíll prance,
even on his first date with Gail,
he cooked her chilli in his underpants.
He loves The Grand Prix and Ferraris,
something grandfather, ífredí, has passed on,
loves travelling and is dedicated at work
and at Becal he truly has shone.
He is also very fond of Rioja,
not the dear stuff, as you would suspect,
though he canít take too much of the full-bodied juice,
else heís likely for it to traject.
Which reminds me of one Christmas Eve,
we all went to my house from the pub,
with a third couple heíd never met before,
for more drinks and some festive grub.
When Alan and Gail left,
we soon all went upstairs to bed,
next morning, our guestsí van was decorated,
with Alanís stomach offering in red.
You may think I couldnít stoop lower,
youíll be relieved Iím now nearing the end,
I want to sincerely and warmly say,
I consider Alan my very best friend.
I tell Alan this very often,
which is, to Ďthink bigí in his life,
heís moved into a beautiful big house in Wales
and he now has the most lovely new wife.
Gail will be just delighted,
his wallet couldnít have come out too soon.
heís been thinking big, for the Maldives
is the setting for their honeymoon.
They both make a wonderful couple,
Gail looks stunning as you can see,
while Alan looks positively dashing,
as well as the Best Man, yes me!
Iím sure youíll join me in wishing them both,
a life of sheer wedded bliss
and if theyíre not too shy to do so,
they can steal the odd marital kiss.
Iíd like to quote a few lines from Burns,
Iíve tweaked it a little, youíll find,
it conjures up perfectly Alan and Gail,
Iím sure our Scots poet wonít mind.
Their love is like a red, red rose, 
thatís newly sprung in June,
O, their love is like a melodie,
thatís sweetly played in tune.
As fair art they, our wedded pair,
so deep in love, say I,
and they will love each other still,
till aí the seas gang dry.
So let us all raise our glasses, 
to their health and wealth, let us toast,
to their everlasting happiness,
to the bride and groom we love most.



Wedding Speech 2
Recited by a rather flamboyant 
Best Man at the reception

So it is the twenty-ninth,
at last, the month of May,
for Jill and Jon, it's finally come,
it is their wedding day.
All arrangements have been made,
it's finally come together,
Hope any stress has faded away and brought out the sunny weather. Jon, he is a lofty lad, he is a six foot Brummy, He's tall, he's dark, he's handsome but his accent's rather funny. He's trained to be a teacher, he's a musician in a band, Do his pupils learn subjects in Brummy? Does he play with a Birmingham hand? Jill, in Caterham, she grew up, a real South Counties girl, In Vidal Sassoon, she worked awhile, perfecting cuts and curls. She smoked cigars before the rest of actresses, models too, And long before that Monica girl made it famous and very blue. You may now all be wondering, however did they meet? It was by chance, it was fate and oh, so terribly sweet. On holiday one year in Wales, Jill was to meet her man, while staying at her parents' cottage and Jon in his caravan. Out cycling past The Royal Oak pub in Talybont-on-Usk, Jon stopped to have a drink with Jill and her brother, until dusk. They arranged to meet another day, for this, their very first date, at a very swish pub called The Star, they made sure they weren't late. The rest, you know, is history, at last the big day has come, will Jon be accompanying his wife, lindi hopping and giving it some? The union of a mental health worker, with a musician and teacher's background, will be perfectly suited for children as they're sure to be perfectly 'sound.' Congratulations to you, Jill and Jon, we wish you a memorable day, one that's forever remembered and one that's most definitely 'gay'.
Wedding Speech 3 Excerpts from another Best Man's speech The Groom (Of Whom I Know Little)
The time has finally come, it's my slot as the best man, to impart all I know of Jim, as best as I possibly can. There could have been some problem giving this role to me, as, like us all here present, I know not a lot, you see. So thank goodness for email and its fast technology, I now know more of Jim, his mum dished the dirt to me........ .......Now big is what he isn't, even now, compared to the wife, maybe she'd better go country, barefoot for the rest of life. He's a fantastic carpenter, built a huge deck right out to the stream and along with heaps of other great work, he's every woman's dream. For to have your own private handyman living in the home, not only is labour cheap, it prevents female eyes to roam............. ......I certainly hope that I have made some sense to you, as you can appreciate, it was ever so tricky to do, to stand up here in front of you, in all my finery and make a compelling speech of a man so new to me. One thing we know for sure, Viv's met her perfect match and for Jim, our man from Down Under, Viv is quite a catch. To have your very own councillor - well, to me, it's what I think, who better to look after you, should you ever need a shrink. Thank you all for coming, it's been a wonderful and memorable day and thank you all for listening, I'm nearly done, hip hip hooray. But finally, let us all here, stand up and raise a toast to Viv and Jim, the bride and groom that we rate the most. To health, wealth and happiness and other wonderful things, to together, forever, until they both grow wings. Wedding Speech 4 Excerpts from a Groom's Speech ............ I met Marianne at Tesco, where we both had Saturday jobs and soon romance, it blossomed, amid the bloomers and the cobs, we vaguely knew each other, her brother was at school with me, and as both of us played for the pub, I met the whole Jones family. When I proposed to my wife, I had to do it twice, once before going to the pub, under mum-in-law's firm advice, she made me go and ask Gerry, for Marianne's own fair hand, five months on, I proposed again, with the ring in a foreign land. I've got to know my in-laws, pretty well now, I'd like to say, they've welcomed me into the family and kindness they often display. I've something in common with Gerry: football and supporting the pub team, but his following of the Gunners, to my mind, is just well off beam and you'll know his attempts at DIY are often excruciatingly slow, poor Shirley had to wait a whole six years, for her kitchen to be magnifico. Shirley will make a great mum-in-law but I don't wish to sound impolite, I am though somewhat nervous of her as her children she used to bite...........
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